Jolly Japes - 16

Gosh! Have joined the SAS! Many of my friends have also joined up and we are now associate members of what is becoming a formidable force in the vicinity. As you might have guessed, we are all serving in the women's branch of the Society. Hubby thinks they do a topping job being involved as they are in practicle conservation work as well as various charitable events. (How would he know that, I wonder). BIG RON's wife would like to join us too, but is waiting for his permission. Men eh? Gosh!
-Sodbridge Action Society (Women's Branch).

Jolly Japes - 15

Gosh! All hustle and bustle yesterday as hubby wanted to hurry back home from the shops to watch a taped recording of the Liverpool match (his favourite football team). Just had time, though, to buy him some spicy cumberland sausages from our friendly local butcher. After seeing him settled down, decided to nip up to BIG RON's place who I knew would be on his own as his wife visits her sister the same time every week. Marched through the drizzly pour hoping to find him in. Luckily he was, and seemed surprised to see me so early in the day and even more surprised when I refused the drink he offered me. I was jolly well determinded to find out one way or another what was going on between him and this barmaid down at the Plough. People, I began, were beginning to spread all sorts of malicious gossip about him. He cut me short with one of his customary deep chuckles and appeared completely unflustered as he went on to give an explanation of what really went on that day. Apparently, as a good friend of the barman and formerly being in the bar trade himself, he'd offered to lend a hand in shifting some beer casks. But was that all he was handling I wonder. Gosh!

Jolly Japes - 14

Gosh! The charlady who is employed by at least two of my friends who live close by, and who is also a part-time barmaid at the Plough Inn, was overheard by a friend of hubby's, confiding to a party of young, boisterous students celebrating the end of term, that BIG RON has the upper-body strength of an ox. Now who would want to know a thing like that? Well, gosh, me for one. I'll have to get him on his own as its not something I would want to discuss in the presence of his wife who is, after all, a very great friend of mine. Been pouring with rain all day today. Gosh!

Jolly Japes - 13

Gosh! On our way to Edinburgh to viist friends, had to stay en route at the house of my son-in-law (only 2 bedrooms). Hubby calls him a minimalist - blames the way he was brought up! Nevertheless, notwithstanding, we were made quite welcome though son-in-law had run out of hubby's favourite cookies. Thought it best not to mention anything about it though as some people can turn quite funny. Was very misty in Scotland. Gosh!

Jolly Japes - 12

Gosh! "L'esprit de l'escalier". That is a jolly witty piece of French I came across one sunny afternoon last week whilst flicking through some French-language books at the home of one of my many friends. Now, I love all things French, toute simplement, especially their wine (BIG RON can confirm that). This French philosopher's writings are a must for all who have progressed beyound elementary French, so I'll leave the meaning of "staircase wit" to those who have. There, I must be growing serious in my old age. Gosh!

Jolly Japes -11

Gosh! I have a confession to make. I've never told anyone out in Blogland about this before, but BIG RON is actually quite big. I was only teasing when I called him "my little friend". Naturally, we both have a jolly good laugh about it (preferably over a good glass of wine). He simply loves to be called BIG RON and he even signs his name in BLOCK CAPITALS. I'm jolly sure he won't mind me sharing this with you all. Colder today. Gosh!

Jolly Japes - 10

Gosh, the weather in this area, according to Classic FM, will be warm and sunny this afternoon. This is super news as the last time I depended on a weather forecast (when taking the grandchildren out), I was let down rather badly by the Internet. Hubby, (who's feeling rather better today, thank you), says you can always rely on Classic FM as it caters for people who expect high standards of reporting. BIG RON shouted "poppycock"
or something like that, then he only listens to an inferior network which I won't even mention. I can forecast a storm in a tea-cup brewing here. Gosh!

Jolly Japes - 9

Gosh! Have to go to my woman's group meeting tomorrow night and have no idea what theme we should be discussing. We are a pretty shrewd bunch of gals and gosh, I think that's it! "Shrewdness". What a jolly wiz subject. But bother! I seem to remember my son-in-law, who is full of useless information (my hubby says, "full of bullshit", but I would never think of using a word like that myself), saying to me once that the word "shrewdness" can be applied to a group of apes. Now that is thought-provoking; so best keep quiet on that one, then. Overcast and all, today. Gosh!

Jolly Japes - 8

Gosh, I'm in a whirl today. I learn that since I've taken over my son-in-law's identity
(when blogging), he has taken over mine! Hubby says its a fine way of taking the mickey -
although he didn't quite use those words. Son-in-law can now do the same, I suppose,
which is very thought provoking (to use a borrowed expression). BIG RON, my little
friend, finds all this very amusing and says he could send some intimidating messages himself.
I warned him there might be some blog police on the lookout for such pranks. Weather fine.
Gosh!

Jolly Japes - 7

Gosh! Since I took over my son-in-law's identity a couple of weeks ago I've not heard a word
from him. BIG RON, my little friend, says that he might be lying low for a bit. Gosh, perhaps I
should do the same myself, for what if the authorities got wind of this! Raining again today. Gosh!

Jolly Japes - 6

Gosh! As any identity is yours at a click of a mouse these days, I think I'll take over
my son-in-law's name. Will this be the end of the world? Gosh!
-Guess Who, Somerset.

Jolly Japes - 5

Gosh! My eldest grandson today asked me what plagarism is. I had to correct him
and to say that what he meant was plagiarism and that he would learn all about that
when he started writing blogs. I explained that it's when people can't think of anything
original to say and copy what others have written. "Gosh", he said, "Does that mean
that I can have my own computer"? Now where did that idea come from? Gosh!
-Guess Who,Somerset.

Jolly Japes - 4

Gosh! What a jolly good wheeze. As hundreds of my friends read my blogs, not only will
they learn of things past, but my social diary could become an open book for all to make note
of all future events. Hubby at first thought this a super idea, but then rather spoilt things by
predicting that there might be a possibility of hundreds of gatecrashers and other undesirables
taking advantage of the given information. So back to the drawing board with that one then.
Well, yesterday I went over to my son-in-law's place with some home made jam which he adores.
He congratulated me on my blogs and all the interesting things I had to say in them. He said
I could write a book, but I don't think he was serious. But gosh, that is something to think about.
Hubby says it certainly is thought provoking - I shall slosh him if he says that again! In the
afternoon, popped into my neighbour's for a coffee and stayed for two hours chatting. This
was rather tiresome as it turned out for I had intended to clear out the cupboards on the top landing
where I had stored all the things I'd bought at the sales and had completely forgotten about.
I'll be able to get rid of the stuff on ebay, I expect. Hubby says there's a lot of gullible people
out there who would think they'd got a bargain. The grandchildren are screaming out they want
more knitted jumpers again. Will they ever be satisfied? Gosh!
-Guess Who, Somerset.

Jolly Japes - 3

Gosh! It's cold today. Winter drawers on, as they say.
Hubby has bought himself a new car and as he wanted to show off in it, persuaded me
to go for a drive with him. This meant leaving the washing up, but c'est la guerre (French).
It is one of those cars advertised a lot on TV - the one with the big derrière. My friends
have a good laugh about it but hubby says they're just jealous. We had a nice meal in one
of our favourite restaurants washed down (hubby was taking a risk here), with a fine rosé
from China, I was told. Gosh! This reminds me - must buy some fireworks for the grandchildren,
who've gone back to school after Halloween. Stopped on our way home to get hubby some
soothing cream for his complaint. He says he wouldn't want to bother the doctor over such
a little thing. Talk about suffering in silence. Gosh!

Powerfuel People

The new Powerfuel Company has, from this month of November, set in motion a new concept
in Home Heating. Much cheaper than ordinary fuel, it has put at the disposal of the Public this Order:
"Power is available on a dual only setting (where there are no mains). These products can be utilised
in the UK, including the Channel Islands, but not Northern Ireland which is in dispute at this moment
in time. However, if the aforementioned wishes to participate in the future, an additional fee
(The Surplus Tariff) will be applied. Parties concerned have the right to withdraw from these
conditions. Amendments will subsequently be published in the right wing press". Greenpeace has
welcomed these measures as contributing to the lessening of Global Warming in the next century.
-South West Arctic Powerfuel Company,(unregistered).

Jolly Japes - 2

Gosh! There are plenty of big knockers down our street but I think mine (I'm not boasting here),
would be the biggest of them all. That is, until yesterday when someone prised it off our front door.
Gosh! Who would want to do a thing like that? Hubby was furious as you can imagine, but added
sagely that it was very thought- provoking, a favourite saying he uses in a crisis. The postman says
that he blames the parents, but personally, I think it might have been the kids. Must dash off now
to buy some wool to knit some undies for the grandchildren. What a day! Gosh.
-Guess Who, Somerset.